News Titles

[Squeezer]

I was bored at work today and thought it'd be a cool idea to start a new forum game.

Create a news title about anyone on the forums. It can be in Newspaper, or Nightly News Format.

For Example:

Detective Squeezer McGee praised by local police after busting illustrious Bilbo's home. 400 Gigs of Child pornography found in what Feds have called: "About half his stash." More on this at 11!

Now you go.

[Scurvy]

11:00 NEWS UPDATE:

in an astonishing turn of events, Detective Squeezer McGee, local hero, has been taken into custody. Evidence brought forward earlier this evening has proven McGee to be, in reality, the ringleader of the alleged child pornography ring. This scandal is quickly becoming as infamous as the underground asian sex slave market uncovered earlier this year.

Witnesses state that when it became evident he was confirmed guilty, Detective Squeezer jumped in an ice cream truck he had registered under a false identity and ran for the border. after an intense 4.7 mile chase through the neighborhood, local law enforcers had to fight their way through hoards of rioting children to apprehend the perpertrator, who was rocking back and forth on the ground humming 'pop goes the weasel.'

Please stay tuned for more details.



edit: sig was updated before thread was created.

[ConcreteSchlyrd]

An oldie but a goodie

[gran guerrero]

Woman from Nova Scotia, I.d. allegedly sues two men from United states Centurion <ZH> from Orlando, Florida and PH <ZH> from Houston, Texas for sexual harassment on the account of being littered with a spam of images ("konging") that contained clowns and canned Vienna sausage. More on the story, later tonight. Now back to your regular broadcasting.

[I.d.i.o.t.]

Woman from Nova Scotia, I.d. allegedly sues two men from United states Centurion <ZH> from Orlando, Florida and PH <ZH> from Houston, Texas for sexual harassment on the account of being littered with a spam of images ("konging") that contained clowns and canned Vienna sausage. More on the story, later tonight. Now back to your regular broadcasting.

Cock your ass, fgt

[gran guerrero]

NEWS UPDATE: evidently it was me

:fear: