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my take on Brexit - from me old Northern Ireland slant

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  • my take on Brexit - from me old Northern Ireland slant

    Wow it's been a while

    wrote this for something else and was holy crap i miss posting this kinda shit in useless crap on them there TW forums

    useless crap 4 lyfe ! shout out to all my buddies i once played and posted with <3

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    Brexit vote shouldn't of even happened but the then prime minister, who has a face that looks like a smacked arse, panicked that UKIP had galvanised the BNP vote and were stealing votes from the tories on fuck the immigrants and i remember when it was ok to be racist in public policies. To appease some ass clowns in his own party who agreed with their brain damaged way of thinking he called the vote and gloriously walked off having fucked the entire country to write his memoirs of sticking his penis in a dead pigs mouth

    Northern Ireland realised that this was generally a really bad thing and voted to stay - only the DUP lead by northern irelands strongest man Arelene Foster decided that it was in fact a great idea as it would give them even more power to attempt to keep Norn Iron as the last bastion of a backwater religious state where its laws could oppress gays and women wanting abortions.

    Theresa May not actually a human but a reanimated crow with an insatiable appetite for power took the poisoned chalice said some oneliners about brexit that didnt make sense or give any information on it so was lapped up by the public and had her at a high point in the opinion polls so she called a snap election doing a u turn on when she said she wasnt going to do that but now she thought she would increase her seats its a fantastic idea before managing to take a majority and come back with a hung parliament so had to make a dodgy deal with the DUP to prop up her relentless long cling to power

    the DUP loving the influence and power they had attained quickly struck a deal for a quick loan for approximatly the same amount they wasted on a flawed heating scheme while the whole of the UK went ? who are the DUP? they believe what? are you fucking serious? in this day and age??

    THe EU and ireland are still pretty cool and realise that this is all fucked but are willing to cut Northern Ireland a deal to give it special status and try and make the best of a bad lot. THe scots welsh and even london went WHOA thats a GOOD deal --- we want in on that c'mon alot of us voted to stay in the EU this is a disaster can we have some of that Northern Ireland deal ? Unperturbed at the wishes of the people of northern ireland , any political advisor or comon sense - right as this was about to be signed northern irelands strongest man blew his trumpet shouted no surrender, Dublin wont get their way amirite lads! and threatened the power hungry crow that he would collapse the government if there was even a hint that norn iron was different to the rest of the uk apart from it having its own out of date laws differing to the rest of the UK where it suits him and so the deal was scrapped.

    Now the DUP are happy - It wont stop cross border initiatives but wont make them easier and they gain from an alienated northern ireland as it helps them fight with sinn fein to polarise the electorate and get the easy sectarian share of the vote to stay as the biggest party in northern ireland. It helps there identity to feel more British than EU and they are delusional so may believe they are going to get a load of great trade deals even though this is not the case. MOst of them are rich enough anyway so will be allright and they get a lot of votes from poor areas and thats not going to change as they only have to say - we fucked it to dublin and wave the union jack and they will get their votes.
    In my world,
    I am King

    sigpic

  • #2
    Originally posted by Pressure Drop View Post
    Theresa May not actually a human but a reanimated crow with an insatiable appetite for power took the poisoned chalice said some oneliners about brexit that didnt make sense or give any information on it so was lapped up by the public and had her at a high point in the opinion polls so she called a snap election doing a u turn on when she said she wasnt going to do that but now she thought she would increase her seats its a fantastic idea before managing to take a majority and come back with a hung parliament so had to make a dodgy deal with the DUP to prop up her relentless long cling to power
    this was one of the funniest fucking political events i've ever witnessed, theresa may completely owned herself with that snap election



    and now this guy is my new hero
    NOSTALGIA IN THE WORST FASHION

    internet de la jerome

    because the internet | hazardous

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    • #3
      it would be a hell of a lot funnier if Corbyn had won - hope he wins next time

      but the reality is it's too close to home to be that funny as i'm sure Theresa May would have just ignored the DUP and did that deal if they werent propping her up - still it's gone spectaullarly wrong for her and her own party rebelled to get a final vote in the house of commons on whatever the brexit deal and she is in a really weak position all over with letters from johnston and gove bullyling her in the background and making demands lea

      least i have duel citizenship and an Irish EU passport allready
      In my world,
      I am King

      sigpic

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Pressure Drop View Post
        it would be a hell of a lot funnier if Corbyn had won - hope he wins next time

        but the reality is it's too close to home to be that funny as i'm sure Theresa May would have just ignored the DUP and did that deal if they werent propping her up - still it's gone spectaullarly wrong for her and her own party rebelled to get a final vote in the house of commons on whatever the brexit deal and she is in a really weak position all over with letters from johnston and gove bullyling her in the background and making demands lea

        least i have duel citizenship and an Irish EU passport allready
        im posting without double checking from google or something, but didn't that pact with the DUP really piss off either sinn fein or it's political party equivalent? it was looking real dicey there for a moment, i remember alot of twitter jokes about the Troubles 2.0 and shit like that
        NOSTALGIA IN THE WORST FASHION

        internet de la jerome

        because the internet | hazardous

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